Why Don't You Just Get A Dog?

Back in November I had an especially bad period of time thanks to broodiness, I went through several days very withdrawn and close to tears thanks to the havoc hormones were playing on me.. It started after a friend's very successful home water birth and was intensified by meeting their new son when he was less than 20 hours old... all occurring at the start of a period didn't help either. It was funnily enough, one of the times that I just had to let hubs know what was going on and how I was feeling, it would not have been fair to him to not.

So I don't think it was at all coincidental that a week or so later is when he announced that he felt we were ready for a puppy.

Now, I wasn't complaining, I wanted a dog just as much as he did.. I just think he was hoping it would help me more than it has.

There seems to be an underlying attitude over here that dogs are training for children... it seemed ridiculous to me. Having since compared notes with my sister there may be something in it, but not completely. I do not think being a successful puppy owner will make you a good parent, there are just not enough similarities there.

I didn't mind much what age dog we got, it's going to involve work and training either way, but hubs really wanted a puppy, and who was I to say no?

We put it off for a while due to travel and eventually got the puppy in March at the age of 10 weeks old. His first shock was due to not realising just how much work a puppy of that age entails. It actually turned out to be a good thing that the company I worked for had gone bankrupt and I was out of a job as it meant I got to be at home all the time during the early days. We spent at least a month exhausted as we were getting up at all hours to make sure she went to the toilet outside.

I'll be honest, our pup has some issues. As far as I can figure out from the records we have she was taken from her mother too young and dumped in a shelter so I think at least some of them stem from this.. The rest are just because she's too damn smart and therefore stubborn!

Initially he got increasingly frustrated with her because she wasn't understanding him, she was doing things he didn't want her to. So he's had to learn a lot of patience. This is a good thing, and I'm glad he's been able to work through this with a dog and not a child. It annoyed him that she didn't just know that she shouldn't try to get to the kitchen work surfaces (taking an example here), she'd done it once and we'd told her off, why wasn't she getting it. He just didn't realise that telling once doesn't work and she needs it repeated and repeated with no slip ups and no letting it go "just this once."

He's gotten a lot better now, and so has she. She's still smart and stubborn, as strong-willed as her namesake (Granny Weatherwax from the Discworld series of novels), but as she gets older (nearing 8 months now) she learns more, she calms down. She still gets manic when we have visitors, but she's still young.

So, I've told you about getting the pup, and how it helped hubs and in fact probably did prepare him a little more for children, but what about me?

Honestly, it's done nothing to help my broodiness. For the first couple of months while she was young and more of a handful it distracted me, but at no point did she fill that hole in my heart. Yes, I love her, she is in her way part of the family, but she can not and will not ever be a child of mine and therefore the hormones bubble away the same as if we didn't have her at all.

In fact, when I'm at my lowest (especially if she's misbehaving), she's just one more drain on our resources, one more reason why we can't afford children right now. And I feel bad for feeling like that, don't get me wrong, I don't want to return her to the shelter, but why is a dog an okay drain but not a child?