Timing

The house hunt has gone well and we're looking to move in a couple of months. This is exciting but has given me time to start thinking about the babyless situation that I have been able to keep out of my mind for the past few months. At around the same time, I had my 27th birthday (a kind of private deadline on being pregnant), our local family planning clinic has halved the number of free condoms you can have in a month, meaning we've had to research the rhythm method (more efficient than people realise when done properly, but doing properly means knowing your fertility well and that's a little painful), talking to new parents and hearing about others and having a friend tell me she's pregnant again.

This last is way and away the most painful because this woman told me she wasn't planning on having a baby yet when I was last miscarrying and, judging by the birth of her first, must have fallen pregnant within weeks of this. My mind keeps going back to her text and I haven't been able to bring myself to conbgratulate her because it would be hollow.

Every time I feel like maybe we'll be able to afford it soon, things change.

Husbit watched one of the Naked Gun films recently, the one that starts with the wife of Lesley Neilson being in a court room filled with nursing mothers. He thought the joke was that it meant the court room was biased until I glanced at the screen and went "yeah, I have days like that".

Why do babies all arrive together? Is it a perceptual bias, that something triggers a bit of baby crazy and then you see every other instance of it? I guess it must be but it doesn't feel like it. It feels like victimisation.